48 HRS. (1982)

STARRING:
NICK NOLTE, EDDIE MURPHY

KILL METER: 3/6

48hrs_1247030iNick Nolte’s a scummy, low-life, racist cop. Eddie Murphy’s a smooth talking convict. They get paired up for an action-packed extravaganza in 48 hrs.

tumblr_m8h9na2YPl1rb0lsao1_500Nolte’s working a drug case, and it is not going well! He’s got zero leads, and he’s made absolutely no progress on this thing whatsoever. Mainly, because he’s a lazy, fat, loser cop, but also cause he doesn’t know the first thing about where drugs come from. He might know a lot about doing them, though, cause he acts pretty sketchy through most of this movie.

Well, one day, while he’s cruising the local prison, asking for info about “drugs”, he suddenly sets his beady little weasel eyes on Murphy. Right away, Nolte just assumes this guy knows everything there is to know about drug dealing, cause he’s black and in jail and all. So, Nolte approaches him with an offer he can’t refuse: He’ll pull EM out of lockup in exchange for his street connections. But, hey, just for 48 hours, then your jive-talking ass is headed back to the slammer, Murphy.

tumblr_mdz549X21s1rkf7sao1_500Well, when Nolte picks Murphy up at the precinct the next day, EM’s all decked out in a fancy business suit, and NN is like “black man in a suit. That’s really weird. Cause he’s black and all.” He tells Murphy that the first thing they gotta do is have a little Q&A session with one of Murphy’s sources, so they head on over to Murphy’s old neighborhood, deep in the ghetto.

While they’re driving there, EM starts asking Nolte some really disgusting questions about sex, it’s some disturbing shit. He’s all like “Man, when’s the last time you got some poontang? They still call it that, right? Cause I need me some poon!” But he’s been locked up for the last 20 years or so, it’s understandable he’d wanna know how much sex has changed since the 60′s. Nolte get’s super uncomfortable about all of this – he hasn’t had sex since the 60′s either, and he’s kind of wondering the same thing, but he ain’t gonna admit to that shit. So, to prove he’s not a huge loner weirdo, he tells Murphy they’ll stop off at this party he knows about first. Nolte starts going on and on about how there’s tons of girls there, and how he’s banged, like, a thousand of them. In reality, Nolte’s been going to these parties for a long time, and he always goes solo, and leaves the same way, and he’s sick of everybody there laughing their asses off at him. So he’s stoked to go there with a buddy! Even though this buddy’s a blackā€¦

EDDIE-MURPHY-48HRSAnyway, they show up at the Nolte party, which turns out to be a racist, redneck, hillbilly bar, and EM is not feeling that shit at all. But, he decides to just play it cool and deal with these crackers, cause there’s booze here, and after so long in the joint he needs to get shitfaced ASAP.

Everyone at this shindig is totally wasted and riled up already, but when EM walks through those saloon doors, all hell breaks loose! I don’t know what city this movie takes place in, but these goddamn people act like they’ve never, ever seen a black guy in a suit before in their lives. The record scratches right off the turn table, and the entire bar just goes dead quiet. Well, it doesn’t take long before somebody drops the N word, and then shit gets real! Murphy just starts beating the crap out of everyone there, he basically beats up the whole bar. Nolte finally decides enough’s enough and yells “let’s get the hell outta here, Murphy!”

48-hrsWhen they’re back in the car, EM is like “Why in the hell did you take me to some Honky shit like that, you old bastard?!” Nolte just laughs it off, tells him to chill out, and that there gonna go meet up with these ladies he knows. At this point, they’ve both totally forgotten about the case they were supposed to be working on, all they wanna do is try and bang a woman, any woman, or at least get to touch a boob.

They drive up to this house out in the suburbs, where two girls are getting dressed for a night out. NN crawls up to the window, he’s leering at them and fogging up the glass, and It’s pretty obvious he doesn’t actually know these girls at all. Then, while he’s grinning at Murphy, he just opens up the window and climbs right on through. EM’s like “you sure you know these bitches, Nolte?” But Nick Nolte ignores that shit, he’s howling like a madman and chasing these girls all around their house, and it kinda seems like he’s gonna force himself on one of them. But, luckily, the girls manage to get to a phone and call the cops. Murphy and Nolte end up getting arrested, for all kinds of other shit besides the peeping, like the brawl at the cowboy bar, and Nolte’s also maybe high on cocaine.

500px-48Hrs_021Well, they somehow get released from lockup, and, even more of a shocker, they end up solving that case they were paired up for. Finally, when all’s said and done, Nolte takes Murphy back to jail, but right before he can get out of the car, Nolte grabs his arm, and whispers “Hey, sweet cheeks, when you git outta the clink look me up, we’ll go git sum girls an have a good ol’ time!” And Murphy just looks goddamn horrified. He’s actually glad he’s going back to lockdown, cause since he’s been behind bars, the world’s turned into a crazy ass place, and prison doesn’t seem so bad compared to 48 hours of hanging out with Nick fucking Nolte!

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